Terrifyingly graduating.

Hiya! 

At the moment I'm in the final year of my nursing course. On the 8th of June I hope to receive my bachelor of nursing diploma. By then I will be a person with an official diploma that allows me to take on a responsible job. And responsible it is as a nurse with the lives of many people as your responsibility. 

The 8th of June, it's becoming a rather terrifying date with every day that passes. Teachers instructing us on our dissertation, us having to actually start writing that dissertation whilst still working on our practical skills. My fellow classmates and I are under a lot of stress. We all realise that by the 8th of June we need to have handed in our dissertation, a piece of research that will be read only by the people involved in our learning process. The rest of the world doesn't  give a damn so why all the pressure? Why does it matter so much whether or not I can write a decent essay on research that I didn't even want to do when my profession involves hands on care for the ill. 

This whole graduating process is a bit of a mystery to me, one big mystery with priorities on all the wrong things. But hey who am I to complain?

The above is even just the study part of it all. Than there is the practical part, the part in which the adults in my life start interfering. "Renée what do you want to do once you graduate?" "Do you want to do nursing or do you want to start another course?" "What ward interests you most?" 
Shut up! Shut up! SHUT UP! 

I have not a clue. Okay?! I don't know what I want to do once that stupid piece of paper called a diploma is signed by and handed to me. I don't know what I want to do once I graduate and should be capable of 1; getting a job and  2; having the full responsibility of not only the lives of ill people but also students I'm expected to guide and new colleagues that need to learn what's going on on the ward. And oh my do I not feel competent enough to ever do so. The whole getting my diploma thing absolutely terrifies me, I'm not capable of doing all of that once I sign that piece of paper. And hell, do I not have any clue of what I'll be doing once I graduate. 

Preferably I would take a plane to a deserted island to live out my days where nobody will bother me. But hey, I have a student loan to pay off so that is not an option. 

What would I do like to do once I graduate? I always said I would love to become a paediatric nurse which still piques my interest quite a bit. Besides that I would love to work with neurological patients as well and study the brain more. My ultimate goal would be to work in a research team which develops rehabilitation products to help (paediatric) patients with neurological problems like cerebral paralysis. Mind my language. 
Then there are the other things I love doing, one of which is teaching. I absolutely love to spread knowledge to kids, to watch them grow and develop themselves. To keep them curious towards the world. And becoming an astronaut is something I still secretly dream about but which got thrown out of the window once I became a diabetic. Then there is the one thing I would love NOT to be, a diabetic but hey that's a different story.

In short; there are so many things I would love to do and would love to become all of which nursing will be my starting point. That one diploma I want and am going to sign in June this year. I will get there and I will finish my current internship above expectations and write a kick ass research on whatever subject I'm yet to find. Once I graduate the whole world is at my feet. No more mandatory school gatherings or shifts I need to work. Nothing but the rest of my life waiting for me, a new chapter to start. But first I have to overcome my fear and make it to the 8th of June successfully!

 Lots of love,
ThatDutchGirl96

School has started.

Hey guys!

So it's September, summer is officially a memory, Halloween is almost there, the year is coming to an end and of course worst of all, school has started again. 

Schools all over the world have started again which means that new memories, friends and maybe enemies are about to be made but it also means a lot of new knowledge will be taught to and studied by the students. For most people the start of a new year of school equals the start of a period full of stress, crying, being bullied, having to sit alone during lunchtime and being afraid to fail. I hate it that school has become so known for all the negative things that happen there. You might not believe it and call me a hopeless optimist for still believing this but you have no idea how many great things happen at schools. Yes, I do know that the good things don't make up for the bad and that the educational system that most countries have has the original idea of what education should be about. Education should be available to EVERY SINGLE PERSON on earth whether they live in the USA, the Netherlands or the town ships in South-Africa. We should all be able to go to school, to learn, to go to college and finally get a job. Education should be about teaching kids knowledge they can use in their further lives not about a men who buys 60 watermelons because god knows why? Education should teach kids how to function in nowadays society and not having students work their ass of and still be unable to pay for their students loans and go to school at the same time. 

However, despite all the bad things happening in school and how incredibly stupid our educational system and most governments are for still using it there are some good sides to going to school. Yes, there are so many amazing things that happen only in school. Maybe one day you'll even learn how right your parents were when they said high school or college would be the best part of your life. 

But look around and put on those pink glasses for once. Be that hopeless optimist you never allow yourself to be and look at all the amazing things happening in the halls of your school. Friends are reuniting. People are becoming friends. Even though the weather may say so, summer isn't over yet, everyone is reliving the summer over and over every time they get to talk about it to their friends or in class.

A new year has started which allows you to start over as well. Get yourself some stationary you like, wear your favourite clothes, hug your friends, put all those judgemental thoughts aside and meet new people with an open mind. This new year has so many possibilities, you just have to look around you and sometimes when things seem to go bad again put on those pink glasses. The world has so much to offer all you need to do are the things that make you feel good and make you feel happy. When you are feeling happy make sure to show that to the rest of the world so the world can enjoy your happiness with you.

So, how is your first week of school going? Do you have any back to school advice? If you like it please leave your experiences and/or survival tips in the comments below! Like that we can help each other get through this year together.

Lots of love,
ThatDutchGirl96

Source: http://www.lifehack.org/

Childhood dreams.

Hello!

So last week was full of preliminary examinations. It was a week full of stress, procrastination, books, studying, failing pens, stress, headaches and lot's and lot's of reading and writing. Not one of my favourite weeks (duhhhh) but I managed to pass all of them, which I am super happy about. 
Friday after getting the results of my last examination all the knowledge I obtained over the last weeks drained from my brain. 

Just a little back story here:
Ever since I was a little girl I have had this weird thing with hospitals. For some reason I loved being in hospitals, not with injuries of any kind, no, just wondering around seeing the doctors and nurses do their jobs, trying to make people better, saving them.
At first I always wanted to be a superhero like most kids. Having the ability to fly or to become invisible or to create fire out of thin air. Defeating villains and saving the city, the country or maybe even the world!!! 

As a kid I was always outside doing weird activities to find out which or if I possessed super powers. Running super fast? Nope that's not it. Creating fire? Not happening. Invisibility maybe? Neither. Super strength? Ice powers? Weather control? Flying? No, nope, not happening. So eventually after trying every super power that popped into my mind I had to accept that I was not and will never be a superhero. 

Not late after I gave up my super hero dreams I ended up in the hospital for bad dehydration. That's where my new life goal was brought to life. As I lay there I had plenty of time to watch the nurses pass by and trying to make me and the other kids better. Amazing! In the eyes of little me nurses were super hero's too. Saving people every day or at least trying their hardest to make people better. Sometimes it was just too late.

Ever since that time in the hospital I have wanted to become a nurse. So when I graduated from a school of higher general secondary education (HAVO in Dutch) I immediately applied for a nursing course. When I heard that I had been accepted my dream finally started to become reality. This first step towards my dream becoming reality started in September 2013.

Unfortunately I had to drop out quite quickly. This was a decision I had to make for my own well-being. Last year has been a heavy year for me with lot's of ups and downs. I have changed for the better and learned a lot about my self and life in general. Throughout the gap year I took I have worked at a toy-shop which was sort of a dream come true. I've had a lot of fun working there and it has been an amazing experience. All my life I have been more of an introvert so it was weird, having to socialize with customers every day and constantly being talkative. 

I must say I couldn't have wished for a better place to work and develop myself into a more extrovert person. It was great working there for a year yet I knew I still had a dream waiting for me to make it become real.

And here I am. Attending the same nursing course I dropped out last year and up until this very moment it is going great. I am lucky enough to have an amazing group of students to work with and I have passed all of my first examinations!!!!
I am happy with who I am now yet there is still this dream inside of me. A dream that is slowly becoming reality and in four years from now it might even be my reality!

Lots of love,
ThatDutchGirl96